dislikes much

So today is dislikes.

there are lots of things i dislike.
there's not getting attention from ppl when i want it badly and have worked for it.
there's forgeting something i didnt want to do when i'm on my way to do something i enjoy.
there's not saying my coffee order correctly resulting in badly flavored coffee with no sweetness.

more things would be:
*getting a speeding ticket or two.
*being sad over things uncontrollable.
*feeling like i'm not good enough
*and even feeling to good.

But the dislike in the picture is

having the world at my feet and not knowing what to do.

making a decision when you know both answers are right.
but you can't mix the two.

I am in college for early childhood edu. and it's going well.
i feel i can definitely do it!
it comes to me.

but my heart D
R
O
P
S
when ever i see a doctor or nurse or anything anyone medical.

when i see my future i see myself in a hospital or doctors office talking to people.
i see it, i feel it. but im not good at medical stuff. sure i watch scrubs, but does that make me smart in the field? Yeah you can learn that stuff, but it's hard and hard things ethier make me nervous or they make me not care. its not that i give up easy, but i don't do things that don't make me happy. (double negatives do make me happy.)
so being in childcare comes natural to me a lot of the time, and i have found that when it doesnt there are easy answers everywhere; like asking lindsey lol.
sometimes i question myself because i do something and wonder 'since when do i know things about kids?'
thats the reason i was in childcare in college for the past little while.
it came natural.
and honestly, this is a secret, but when things happened in school and i was unhappy or just very happy with something i would hear in my mind 'when iam a teacher and have a class room i will/willnot do this' and then i would shake my head and think oh yeah, i would never be a teacher so i wouldnt have that chance and laugh.
i assumed that since i had spent so much time in school it made me think thats what adults are.

but the thing is i want to try medical.
see it.
feel it.
& wear scrubs.
and watch it lol.

i hate having the choice to do one of two great things, knowing that i might still want the other down the road. The world is here at my toes saying you should know what haves you happy.
so maybe i know what would make me happy.
we'll see.



OHHHH what shall Lindsey pic blog about tomorrow?
i want to say something that is easy because i dont want to make her work to hard, but if i know her, i think she would be up for a challenge.


so........




tomorow's blog will be....






Something Big Even Tho It's Small.


ummm wedness = math


Alisa